Come close, I have to tell you a secret: I know what your friend really wants.Read More
One way to spend this season is to fret that it’s too good to be true,
going around knocking on wood, daring not to say or even think that things are going well, for fear of waking the sleeping giant,
waiting for the shoe to drop,
spending days staring at the sky,
eyes playing tricks, convincing the brain that perhaps a glimmer of a shoelace was seen.
I see you thinking about who sat in that chair last year at this time.
I see you watching your beloved with concern about what will happen between now and next Thanksgiving.
I see you being asked how things are, and giving answers that only scratch the surface,
so that this doesn’t go down as the Thanksgiving that you cried in your potatoes and made things awkward.Read More
It’s as if the sculptor is working backwards, taking a masterpiece and breaking it apart bit by bit, chisel in hand, never seeming to be satisfied with a work of art that was perfect to begin with.Read More
Living in this moment means waiting.Read More
WHERE WAS I
When I signed up to be a caregiver,
to be your caregiver?
Over time, a silent agreement has been made that our vernacular and that of those around us, should eliminate talk of the far-off future.Read More
The Civic is driven with multiple indicator lights blazing on the dashboard,
each of which is ignored
or deemed unimportant,
since the car continues to run.
He knows that walking from the gate to the baggage claim, though hard on his physical heart,
is easier on his proverbial one than feeling the looks and sensing the judgement of those who think there are only two of them on this trip, not three.
Just like a t-shirt or a bracelet, I use my coffee mugs to set my mantra for the day. I choose them carefully and with joy and cradle them in my palms as I slowly sip my coffee throughout the morning.Read More
I cannot let myself be immersed,
For there are too many proverbial buckets of vomit reeking in illegally parked cars that need to have my feet in them as well.Read More
Instead of being hooked up to tubes and cords, Sean is hooked only to the basketball game on TV.Read More
He collapsed from his wheelchair,
crumpled to the floor,
a rumply pile of the man I love.Read More
The puppy dog eye thing is not helpful....although to be fair/confusing if you asked about my chronically ill husband with eyes bright and chipper I may have to punch you in my mind. (Did I mention that you can't win? You can't.)Read More
As if the divide between me in the waiting room and him in the operating room doesn’t already seem cavernous enough, it’s as if they are un-marrying us with this act.Read More
He looked at me with big eyes and said quietly, "Oh. I see what you mean. She is kinda doing exactly what you wanted to do."Read More
I pull up and see my daughter standing at the door and I know something is wrong.Read More
But I don’t need to write about that. Those are the well-practiced speeches you hear from caregivers everywhere. I’m here to say that there is more to those speeches, there is more to those caregivers, and there is more to this role than you can imagine, all sitting there unseen and unappreciated in the negative space.Read More