Welcome, caregiver, to the meditation for surgery day. The Negative Space is here to help you move through this day one moment at a time. While others are focused on your loved one, this time and this space are for you. We’re glad you’ve chosen to be here, because taking time for yourself is essential for your well-being.
We know that surgery day can be uniquely challenging for caregivers. Focusing on moving through this day one moment at a time will support you in managing all that arises: from fear to boredom, to sadness, to frustration, to relief, and everything in between. There is much that is beyond your control today, and taking it one moment at a time can help you feel less overwhelmed.
Let’s begin. I invite you to take a moment to find a comfortable position, honoring whatever feels best to your body right now. If you are in a hospital or clinic waiting area, the space you’re in may not feel comfortable or soothing to you. Just do what you can to find even a little ease, maybe moving to a more comfortable chair, adjusting how you are sitting, or moving away from a loud television.
Notice whatever is physically supporting your body. Perhaps this is the ground or the chair you are sitting on. If possible, feel yourself sink a little deeper into that support. Notice that you are breathing in and out. If you feel comfortable, you can place one hand on your breastbone and one hand on your belly. Let yourself feel the gentle movement of your breath without any effort to control or change it. Or perhaps it would feel good to place your hands on your thighs, noticing the pressure of your hands on your legs. During this guided meditation, you’ll notice thoughts arise. This is natural, and not a problem. Simply notice when you are distracted and welcome yourself back to the sound of my voice. You might have to do this again and again, and that’s ok.
If you like, check in with your body. Notice how your body feels right now. You might observe areas where there is tension and areas where there is more ease. Perhaps there are places that don’t feel good or bad, but simply feel neutral; or places where you don’t have much awareness. With each thing you notice, just be as curious as possible. There is no need to fix anything. Take a moment to look around you. Try to take in everything you can see with a neutral, curious attitude. Slowly scan in front of you, to the sides, and even behind you. Notice people and objects, notice light and shadow. Notice color. What are three colors you can see right now? Let your gaze linger for a moment on each color.
Look down and see your feet on the floor…and your hands resting on your lap or by your sides. As you look, tell yourself, “Here are my feet. Here are my hands. I am here.”
Now, if you like, you can close your eyes or rest your gaze softly in front of you. In addition to my voice, can you hear any other sounds right now? Bring curiosity to the experience of listening. Even if you can hear sounds that are annoying or jarring, simply try to notice them without judging. Let the simple act of listening be a practice to help you be present in this moment. Note to yourself two sounds you can hear right now. Let your attention linger for a moment on each sound.
Next, bring your fingers to a piece of your clothing. Zoom your awareness in on your sense of touch and let all other senses, thoughts, and sensations be in the background. Continue to focus on what you feel with your fingers. Is it smooth? textured? soft? scratchy? There’s nothing else you need to do right now. Just pay detailed attention to this one thing you can feel. Let your attention linger for a moment on how it feels.
Tuning into your senses can help you to be present and to take this day one moment at a time. Now that we’ve done this, check in with yourself. Notice how your mind and body feel right now. How has the practice of focusing on what you can see, hear, and touch felt for you? If you’ve found it helpful, feel free to come back to your senses again throughout the day.
Invite your attention to turn back, now, to the physical support beneath you. Feel your body sink into it, and notice if this feels different from when you checked in with yourself at the beginning of the meditation. Notice again that you are breathing in and out. That your feet are here. Your hands are here. You are here.
As this meditation draws to a close, you might choose to place your hand on your heart to acknowledge the importance of showing up for yourself and to honor the choice you made to be here, setting aside this time for your well-being. Then take a moment to gently move your body, maybe wiggling your fingers and toes or gently turning your head, and then slowly blink your eyes open.
As you move forward on this big day, remember that you can move through it one moment at a time, and that through it all, we, at The Negative Space, are here for you.