Welcome, caregiver, to the meditation for realistic self-care. While the focus is often on your loved one, at The Negative Space we are here to remind you that your well-being matters, too, and that taking time for yourself is essential for your well-being.
Caregiver, this time and space are for you. We’re so glad you’ve chosen to be here.
Let’s begin. I invite you to take a moment to find a comfortable position, honoring whatever feels best to your body right now. You can close your eyes or softly rest your gaze in front of you. Notice whatever is physically supporting your body. If possible, feel yourself sink a little deeper into that support. Notice that you are breathing in and out. If you like, you can place one hand on your breastbone and one hand on your belly. Let yourself feel the gentle movement of your breath without any effort to control or change it.
During this guided meditation, you’ll notice thoughts arise. This is natural, and not a problem. Simply notice when you are distracted and welcome yourself back to the sound of my voice. You might have to do this again and again, and that’s ok.
If you like, check in with your body. Notice how your body feels right now. You might observe areas where there is tension and areas where there is more ease. Perhaps there are places that don’t feel good or bad, but simply feel neutral; or places where you don’t have much awareness. With each thing you notice, just be as curious as possible. There is no need to fix anything.
Caregiver, although your focus, time, and energy are invested in caring for your loved one, your well-being matters, too. Realistic self-care means showing up for yourself in ways that feel supportive to you. Sometimes this may involve doing an activity you love. Sometimes this may involve doing nothing at all. Right now you are listening to this guided meditation. This, too, is an act of self-care.
If you like, shift your attention to the center of your chest, right behind your breastbone. In yoga, this is known as your heart center, which is associated with love and compassion. Let your breath be relaxed, breathing in and out softly through your nose, if possible. There is nothing you need to do right now. Just be here, following the sound of my voice.
Realistic self-care means treating yourself as someone who is deserving of care. It means valuing yourself not just as a caregiver for your loved one, but as a human being who is worthy of love and respect. If you like, try repeating the words, “I am worthy,” to yourself for the next few breaths. Let these words fill your mind and body.
Realistic self-care invites you to accept the fundamental truth that your well-being matters, too. That despite the complexities of caring for your loved one and managing all of your other responsibilities and commitments, you are worthy of your own time and attention. That caring for yourself is important and valid. [pause]
Caregiver, if you have become accustomed to believing that your needs don’t matter, or that caring for yourself isn’t a priority, please don’t judge yourself. Self-care isn’t something to criticize yourself for doing wrong. Developing a new mindset or shifting behavior takes time, and the most important thing you can do to build a new self-care habit is to be patient and kind to yourself, and to accept yourself as you are in this moment. This is an act of self-care. If you like, try it and notice how it feels. [pause]
If you like, bring your awareness back to the center of your chest, back to your heart center, and to any sensations you feel there. You are always welcome to place one or both hands on your breastbone if that feels supportive right now. There is no right or wrong. You can come back to the words “I am worthy,” if that resonated for you.
True self-care relates to how you view and treat yourself on a daily basis. True self-care is understanding, and believing, that you are worthy of care. And it occurs when you tend kindly to your mind and body in small but meaningful ways. There are unlimited opportunities for self-care. What you choose depends on what feels supportive to you. Self-care might be taking a walk around the block,or listening to a favorite song, or taking a few slow, conscious breaths or gentle stretches. True self-care does not require extensive time or money. Rather, it requires a willingness to show up for yourself and a belief that your well-being matters, too.
If you like, bring your awareness to your heart center again. Notice any sensations. Has anything shifted? Just be curious. There’s no right or wrong. I’m going to be quiet for 30 seconds. During this time, you might imagine that there is a glowing, healing light at the center of your chest: a light that glows brighter with each breath. You can always come back to the words “I am worthy,” or return your focus to the simple awareness of whatever is supporting your body right now. This is your time, so please do whatever feels welcome.
As this meditation draws to a close, you might choose to place your hand on your heart to acknowledge the importance of showing up for yourself and to honor the choice you made to be here, setting aside this time for your own well-being. When you are ready, take a moment to gently move your body, maybe wiggling your fingers and toes, or gently turning your head, and then slowly blink your eyes open.
As you move forward with your day, remember that your well-being matters, too, and that we, at The Negative Space, are here for you.